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Beau's Journey » 2010 » June » 02

Archive: June 2nd, 2010

June 2, 2010: Evening thoughts…

You know, I found a nice place in the house hill on the hill near Round Knob.  A place to sit down and relax.  To look out over the living room and dining room.  I just fall into the chair – it takes me somewhere that I can’t explain.  Relaxing.  Quite.  Peaceful.  I can see across the room and into the kitchen.  I look over everything I Have – how beautiful it looks to me.  Everything is in its little place.  Nothing is crooked or out of place.  Perfect.

Just to way I like it – I think to myself.

It is so quiet in the room now.  I feel at peace.  I take a deep sigh and then another.  Thinking back over the years.  Gosh, there was a day when I didn’t have anywhere to stay.  Back in the 90s.  Sleeping in a tent outside of the old youth center.  First a big tent – but it flooded and nearly caught on fire one night.  I actually had moved a couple of pieces of furniture into the tent.  A place to sleep and keep some of my clothes.  I don’t know what I was thinking.  I just needed a place to lay my head.  I was too proud to ask others.

Then I got a smaller pup-tent.  It slept pretty much just me.  Although one of my friends stayed with me once or twice.  I had a sleeping bag in it.  It was cold – winter.  We had a huge snowstorm near our region one weekend and I literally thought I was going to freeze to death.  But, I didn’t.  It was a challenege to me – of some sort.

I was trying to pay bills.  Trying to save money.  I had several jobs at the time – 2 or 3 jobs.  One at Wal Mart and one at Southern Seven Health Department – and oh year the hotel.  Don’t forget the hotel job.  Worked midnights there and Wal Mart.

Those were long days.  To say the least.

Then during the late 90s I had the most profound identity crisis.  I had no clue as to what direction I was going.  Where I was heading.  What I would do next.  Talk about hopeless.  I really felt hopeless.  I thought it was all over – many days and nights.  But, I help on – barely.  But on none-the-less.

That is what I am thinking about while I set in this chair in the middle of this room – in the middle of this beautiful house.  I think back to the day that all I had was a tent.  I can’t say I was happy living in the tent – but I can’t say I was sad, either.  At the time that was the only thing I knew.  So, I guess I was happy just to have a place to sleep at night.  I didn’t think about the obstacles that were being put before me.  I just thought about surviving and get to the next day.

Which I did.  🙂

Life is funny – you never know what tomorrow might bring.  You never know what might be around the next corner.

We all sleep below the same moon in the dark sky.  We all sleep under the glittering stars that are sprinkled above by some rhyme that we can’t understand or fully grasp.  We may sleep in different houses, we may sleep in different cities, but we all sleep under the same sky, the same moon, and the same stars.  Even as we change, some things never change, thankfully.




June 2, 2010: Packing for Alaska – big storms today

Well, we are packing for Alaska.  We leave tomorrow – mother hopefully has packed!  I know she is usually a bit slower to pack.  She keeps calling me and asking me questions – so I guess that is a good sign.

We have someone watching the house while we are away.  So, that is taken care of.

We had big storms today – wind gusted to 52 and 53 mph up here on the hill.  Pea size hail and lots of rain.  The wind sounded horrible on the house – really hit it like a wall.  Just went from nothing to 50+ in almost no time.

Looks like the oil spill continues – BP is in a lot of trouble.  Terrible for the Gulf of Mexico.